Pairing: Seulkai[Seulgi and Jongin]
Concept: :((( [Completed] Please listen to Lay Me Down by Sam Smith as you read this. She had called 4, 7, 10 times. She wasn't even sure anymore, it was probably more than that. She didn't want to bother him but at the same time the heavy feeling on her chest wouldn't leave her and made her unable to think reasonably. She needed to see him. Seulgi felt helpless. She left a few messages too, asking him to call her back as soon as he could, as soon as he wanted to, as soon as he would need her. Seulgi needed to let him know that she was there, Jongin had to know she would be there for him. Seulgi put down her phone on the coffee table and huddled against her knees on the couch. It was now 11:12 pm and Jongin hadn't given her one sign of life yet. She just wished he was breathing, blinking, crying or even completely immobile it didn't matter, next to her. She wanted Jongin near her. She had to see him with her own eyes to make sure he was okay. Was it stress that made her restlessly imagine all the possible ways he could be feeling right now? Perhaps it was because Seulgi knew him so well that she knew he wasn't alright. He couldn't be. Because she knew he wasn't and if he wasn't then she wasn't neither. She could feel his pain from miles away and it hurt. She cried all day and as if that wasn't enough, she spent the rest of it calling him. Now that she was done with her own grief, she had to take care of him. Jongin was all that mattered in this moment. Seulgi picked up her phone like it was an impulsive twitch she caught in the last hours and checked to see if he had left a message or texted her. None, it was still empty. He would come see her when he would feel the need to, if ever. Her left shoulder would always be his, it was there for him to let his frustrations out and cry. "Humans cry, it is not about being a man or a woman. What should I do if I have feelings?" "It will be alright," Seulgi whispered. She wasn't sure who she was trying to comfort at this point, it wasn't clear. "You will get through this Jongin." A deep sigh escaped her lips as she remembered her first reaction to the news. It happened so fast and it was so disheartening, so cruelly sudden. She couldn't imagine how he reacted. He must have felt like the sky fell on him and the world stopped turning. Seulgi heard three soft hesitant knocks on her door and she didn't need more to know it was him. She ran to the door and took him in her arms as soon as she could. Maybe she needed it more than he did. "Seulgi," he whispered in the crook of her neck. His voice was so weak, so soft. He unknowingly made all his pain transparent by saying her name alone. Seulgi held tighter onto his fragile frame. Had he even eaten anything today? "I'm here, I'm right here Jongin," she said as she patted his back. "I am not going anywhere." Jongin let his head fall onto her shoulder and took a deep and long breath. "It's okay, you don't have to say anything." "It will be okay." "You don't have to be strong, Jongin. You can cry, it's just me." For some strange reason she couldn't understand, Seulgi started sobbing as she said those encouraging words. Hot tears started rolling down her cheeks and her voice became weaker as she spoke. Seulgi unconsciously brought him even closer to her. Oh how she wished to be able to take his pain away. To protect him against the harsh reality and bring him back to happier days. "Tomorrow will already be better than today." "Do not worry Jongin, I have your back and you can take my shoulder if you want," she mumbled as the tears began to interfere with her words. Jongin reached to wipe her tears away with his thumb and tried to give her a tired smile as she let her head rest on his chest. "Let me help you," Seulgi said. "I want to help in any way I can." "You don't have to do anything." These were the first words Jongin told her. His voice was muffled and broken from crying too much but once again he was being thoughtful of her. Seulgi could hear the tiredness in his voice. She took his hand and slowly brought him to the couch where she asked him to sit. She didn't want to pressure him to talk, silence in those times could be the best way to help someone. As they sat down, Jongin automatically let his head rest on her laps. "Do you want anything to drink?." she asked. "I don't have much in the fridge but I could run to the supermarket if you're hungry." "Just stay." Jongin closed his eyes and mumbled a few last words before drifting to sleep very slowly. Maybe it was the first time he found the time to sleep since it happened and finally could rest a bit. Seulgi decided she wouldn't bother him. As long as he could find some sort of peace with her around then she was fine, that's all she wanted. Seulgi hesitantly brought her hand to his face and brushed off a few strands of hair as Jongin slept soundlessly on her laps. She softly caressed his eyelids and kissed his temple. "I'm sorry that I can't do more than this," Seulgi whispered as she felt her eyes fill up with unwanted tears again. "I wished I could cast a magic spell and make everything better." Jongin took the hand she used to ruffle his hair and gave it a slight squeeze. "This is more than enough Seulgi," he mumbled with his eyes still closed. Jongin went back to sleep with his hand tightly wrapped around Seulgi's tiny hand as she hummed an old lullaby she vaguely remembered from her childhood. He didn't let go of her hand once even when he shifted in his sleep as if he was drowning and it was a life buoy. It was then that Seulgi decided that as long as Jongin needed her, she would stay by his side.
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